Me: Good morning.
Him: Hello. Interesting news, an earthquake measuring 5.4 on the Richter scale was felt throughout Southern California early Monday. The aftershocks are still being felt through Kirstie Alley.
Me: Where's... what? Oh. OH. You... you are a VERY BAD MAN.
Him: *smirk*
Me: SMIRKING ONLY MAKES IT WORSE.